The church visiting that I've done (only two, let's be real here) has been very eye-opening in many ways. It's forced me to reflect on many things I sort of absorbed into my consciousness, things I took for granted, and things I need to make sure are valid.
I didn't realize how much of my church has been wrapped into my identity. I have always wanted to be part of a big family, part of a place where I'm accepted for who I am and for what I believe without being too judged, and I've felt that at church. But more than that, my church has also defined my belief system about God, Jesus, and the Holy Spirit, and I have been challenging myself on what surrounds that. Churches can easily say the right things on the "What We Believe" or "About Us" portion of their website, and I want to make sure that when I go there in person, that what they say matches what they believe.
Things like:
1) Jesus saves. ie, Salvation.
2) God sent Jesus to save us. ie Justification/Redemption.
3) God sent the Holy Spirit to guide us, to change us, and to make us more like Him. ie Sanctification.
4) God gave us His word to teach us. ie, the inerrancy of scripture.
But even more than that...
5) What is the belief system on sin and what is taught on it?
6) What does church membership mean to another church?
7) Does God do the work in our hearts, and what is our part?
8) What is the narrow path? Is the easy road taken in teaching/preaching?
9) Is the teaching man-centered or Jesus-centered?
10) How is the church organized? Is it inward or outward?
11) Are the youth taught with depth about why they should abstain from sin, ie smoking/drinking/sex/swearing/disobedience? Why does all of that matter? Is it just obedience or is there more to it?
12) How do members proclaim their love, their joy for Jesus? Where is it on Sunday morning? Where is it during the week? Where is it when tragedy strikes?
Monday, July 22, 2013
Sunday, July 21, 2013
My Niece's 1st Birthday
About a month ago, K & I flew to Chicago to celebrate my niece's first birthday.
There was shopping.
There was biking.
There was sightseeing.
There was talking/laughing.
There was playing with the niece.
K and I spent the first day out at the mall in Westmont while my sister and my parents went to buy a new car. I think we got the better end of the deal, even if we did walk a lot at the outdoor mall. We ate at Maggiano's, shopped at a lot of clothing stores, and just overall had a good time together. After lunch, we went home and helped get ready for the party. We actually trimmed bushes outside, helped blow up balloons, and made sure all the food items (popcorn, rice krispie treats, etc) were ready. My sister had planned a "bubbles and balloons" theme and really went all out. She'd hired people to put a tent in the backyard and had a lot of food and fun planned. Speaking of fun, K and I also took our first bike rides on my sister's bikes. Those were (quite literally) the best bikes I've ever ridden in my entire life. Easy to ride, no gear changing even on smaller hills, and a smooth experience. I even made K put on a helmet!
On my niece's birthday, it was a madhouse getting ready because the party was at 10 am. So we got catered food, finished decorations, and made sure she had the right outfit on. My sister hired a balloon specialist/tattoo artist; someone who could not only create balloon animals, but also put tattoos on kids that wanted to look like a rebel without a cause. My sister started noticing texts around 9 that people were cancelling...so we had way too much food, but what can you do? People began arriving, and around 30 minutes later, the bottom fell out - a thunderstorm came through. We all huddled in the tent watching the heavy shower around us. Through it all, my sister kept smiling and visiting. She was amazing! The rain stopped, we all ate, and then we decided to let my niece partake of her birthday cake. At that point, her bottom fell out: she began screaming while crying and wouldn't stop. Watching your niece do that while being force-fed birthday cake just makes you want to hold her and run away. She got cake everywhere, even while crying, which was pretty funny. My sister whisked her inside to clean her up while the kids ran around blowing bubbles and popping their balloon animals in the grass. Afterward, a lot of people left while some stragglers stayed, went inside, and played with babies. After everyone left, I would like to say that I went upstairs and took a nap, but I think I just relaxed and we went biking later on. We did go out to eat for dinner at Houlihan's and watched my niece devour tomato soup (I ate a great wrap sandwich). K spent some time at Forever 21 which she didn't get to do the previous day. How much shopping could she do? I was amazed. She is not a shopper.
We all went to Chicago the next day (minus my niece). We stopped at the Bean and the fountains (with faces of people on them) first, watched a kid doing a street dance, and headed to the "Taste of Randolph" food festival in downtown Chicago. We actually rode a bus there, which was interesting because it was the first time I'd taken public transportation there. We got there without incident, but it helped that we had a seasoned Chicago traveler (my sister) to tell us when to get off the bus. It was pretty hot, so we walked slowly through the crowds and bought food from vendors at reduced prices. I got an amazing tomato salad, fish tacos, and some chips and guacamole. While it was great to get all of this food, it was really crowded and there weren't a lot of places to sit. So we left after that and took a bus down to the Pier, where we walked, ate ice cream, and watched the sailboats head into the Bay. We left for home, where we (once again) went biking!
On the last day, we relaxed for the most part. K and I went to a downtown area where we browsed some really cute stores and got some gourmet popcorn. We spent the day playing with the niece and hanging out with my sister. When you have a sister who is as hard-working, dynamic, and caring as mine, that's what you want to do.
There was shopping.
There was biking.
There was sightseeing.
There was talking/laughing.
There was playing with the niece.
K and I spent the first day out at the mall in Westmont while my sister and my parents went to buy a new car. I think we got the better end of the deal, even if we did walk a lot at the outdoor mall. We ate at Maggiano's, shopped at a lot of clothing stores, and just overall had a good time together. After lunch, we went home and helped get ready for the party. We actually trimmed bushes outside, helped blow up balloons, and made sure all the food items (popcorn, rice krispie treats, etc) were ready. My sister had planned a "bubbles and balloons" theme and really went all out. She'd hired people to put a tent in the backyard and had a lot of food and fun planned. Speaking of fun, K and I also took our first bike rides on my sister's bikes. Those were (quite literally) the best bikes I've ever ridden in my entire life. Easy to ride, no gear changing even on smaller hills, and a smooth experience. I even made K put on a helmet!
On my niece's birthday, it was a madhouse getting ready because the party was at 10 am. So we got catered food, finished decorations, and made sure she had the right outfit on. My sister hired a balloon specialist/tattoo artist; someone who could not only create balloon animals, but also put tattoos on kids that wanted to look like a rebel without a cause. My sister started noticing texts around 9 that people were cancelling...so we had way too much food, but what can you do? People began arriving, and around 30 minutes later, the bottom fell out - a thunderstorm came through. We all huddled in the tent watching the heavy shower around us. Through it all, my sister kept smiling and visiting. She was amazing! The rain stopped, we all ate, and then we decided to let my niece partake of her birthday cake. At that point, her bottom fell out: she began screaming while crying and wouldn't stop. Watching your niece do that while being force-fed birthday cake just makes you want to hold her and run away. She got cake everywhere, even while crying, which was pretty funny. My sister whisked her inside to clean her up while the kids ran around blowing bubbles and popping their balloon animals in the grass. Afterward, a lot of people left while some stragglers stayed, went inside, and played with babies. After everyone left, I would like to say that I went upstairs and took a nap, but I think I just relaxed and we went biking later on. We did go out to eat for dinner at Houlihan's and watched my niece devour tomato soup (I ate a great wrap sandwich). K spent some time at Forever 21 which she didn't get to do the previous day. How much shopping could she do? I was amazed. She is not a shopper.
We all went to Chicago the next day (minus my niece). We stopped at the Bean and the fountains (with faces of people on them) first, watched a kid doing a street dance, and headed to the "Taste of Randolph" food festival in downtown Chicago. We actually rode a bus there, which was interesting because it was the first time I'd taken public transportation there. We got there without incident, but it helped that we had a seasoned Chicago traveler (my sister) to tell us when to get off the bus. It was pretty hot, so we walked slowly through the crowds and bought food from vendors at reduced prices. I got an amazing tomato salad, fish tacos, and some chips and guacamole. While it was great to get all of this food, it was really crowded and there weren't a lot of places to sit. So we left after that and took a bus down to the Pier, where we walked, ate ice cream, and watched the sailboats head into the Bay. We left for home, where we (once again) went biking!
On the last day, we relaxed for the most part. K and I went to a downtown area where we browsed some really cute stores and got some gourmet popcorn. We spent the day playing with the niece and hanging out with my sister. When you have a sister who is as hard-working, dynamic, and caring as mine, that's what you want to do.
Monday, July 15, 2013
The Church, Part 2
There has been so much going on in the last month, not from an "activities" standpoint, but from a "thinking" standpoint, that I have been fairly quiet. Some of my thoughts are related to matters that are confidential, and some are related to matters that I was afraid would be misinterpreted. Thus, the quiet. I've decided to start thinking aloud again at least about one of the matters.
I have been struggling with my break-up, and after discussing the situation with the man I'd been dating, the root of the matter really came down to one thing for me: what church we'd go to. I've been discussing this matter with people I trust. I find that the counsel of wise believers is worth so much - especially when it's from those that you've respected, not just from a "they're smart" perspective, but from people who live godly lives and have studied with you, prayed with you, and cared for you. Ultimately, what I realized is that in two to six years, my children will be grown, probably moved out of Tuscaloosa, and hopefully worshipping in a gospel-preaching church. And while my church family has been my spiritual family, there have been times of loneliness because of being single. It is hard to be single in a small church. No, everyone is not married. We actually have a number of single women, and a few single men. However, when I think of my future, I'd like to be married. I'd like to walk into a marriage knowing what it truly represents: a mirror of Christ and the church. Christ serving the church. And, God's sanctifying grace to the church because of Christ - which represents how sanctification occurs during marriage. These are all concepts that I didn't have any idea about in my first marriage.
So, my thought process followed, if I was dating a godly man who liked the preaching of my church but not the overall worship service, then wouldn't it make sense to see if there was a church that suited both of us? This proved to be much larger of a question than I'd ever realized. Because with this question, you start thinking about what's important in a church. Things like:
What are the basics of belief you won't give on?
How does a church preach on sin?
What does church membership look like?
What does "joy" look like in worship?
What is done in the liturgy (Lord's prayer, reading of scripture, communion, benediction)?
Since I've only ever belonged to one church, I have taken much of what I've done there in the worship for granted. But I think there is much more to church than worship, although that's the first place to start. It's also about the underlying teachings and how they affect our lives from day-to-day. It's about how the members fellowship with one another. And it's about accepting that it's a body of sinners, and in that body, accepting each other's sin and working through differences can also sanctify us. It makes us more like Christ. Isn't that amazing?
So it's with those thoughts (which I've prayed about) that I asked myself, is there another church in Tuscaloosa that might work for me AND the man I'm dating, and if so, what would that mean?
I have been struggling with my break-up, and after discussing the situation with the man I'd been dating, the root of the matter really came down to one thing for me: what church we'd go to. I've been discussing this matter with people I trust. I find that the counsel of wise believers is worth so much - especially when it's from those that you've respected, not just from a "they're smart" perspective, but from people who live godly lives and have studied with you, prayed with you, and cared for you. Ultimately, what I realized is that in two to six years, my children will be grown, probably moved out of Tuscaloosa, and hopefully worshipping in a gospel-preaching church. And while my church family has been my spiritual family, there have been times of loneliness because of being single. It is hard to be single in a small church. No, everyone is not married. We actually have a number of single women, and a few single men. However, when I think of my future, I'd like to be married. I'd like to walk into a marriage knowing what it truly represents: a mirror of Christ and the church. Christ serving the church. And, God's sanctifying grace to the church because of Christ - which represents how sanctification occurs during marriage. These are all concepts that I didn't have any idea about in my first marriage.
So, my thought process followed, if I was dating a godly man who liked the preaching of my church but not the overall worship service, then wouldn't it make sense to see if there was a church that suited both of us? This proved to be much larger of a question than I'd ever realized. Because with this question, you start thinking about what's important in a church. Things like:
What are the basics of belief you won't give on?
How does a church preach on sin?
What does church membership look like?
What does "joy" look like in worship?
What is done in the liturgy (Lord's prayer, reading of scripture, communion, benediction)?
Since I've only ever belonged to one church, I have taken much of what I've done there in the worship for granted. But I think there is much more to church than worship, although that's the first place to start. It's also about the underlying teachings and how they affect our lives from day-to-day. It's about how the members fellowship with one another. And it's about accepting that it's a body of sinners, and in that body, accepting each other's sin and working through differences can also sanctify us. It makes us more like Christ. Isn't that amazing?
So it's with those thoughts (which I've prayed about) that I asked myself, is there another church in Tuscaloosa that might work for me AND the man I'm dating, and if so, what would that mean?
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