Who am I, anyway?

I find sometimes that I have weeks that are so hard. That you have to do things you don't want to, because things are sometimes out of your control.

Preserve me, O God, for in you I take refuge.
² I say to the Lord, “You are my Lord;
I have no good apart from you.”

Did I do enough to prevent these circumstances? Did I handle my own leadership with grace and discipline? Did I correct when I needed to, and provide guidance in the right way?

³ As for the saints in the land, they are the excellent ones,
in whom is all my delight.^[b]

⁴ The sorrows of those who run after^[c] another god shall multiply;
their drink offerings of blood I will not pour out
or take their names on my lips.

 

Is everyone going to think I handled this incorrectly? Is everyone going to blame me?

 

⁵ The Lord is my chosen portion and my cup;
you hold my lot.
⁶ The lines have fallen for me in pleasant places;
indeed, I have a beautiful inheritance.

 

Really, the result of this week was not my doing; this happened because of someone else's doing. Wait, what am I saying? Is everything out of my control?

 

⁷ I bless the Lord who gives me counsel;
in the night also my heart instructs me.^[d]
8 I have set the Lord always before me;
because he is at my right hand, I shall not be shaken.

 

Why do I feel so pained even though I know it's right? How do I let go of this?

 

⁹ Therefore my heart is glad, and my whole being^[e] rejoices;
my flesh also dwells secure.
¹⁰ For you will not abandon my soul to Sheol,
or let your holy one see corruption.^[f]

 

How do I know that I am made right? Not by my own doing, but by His. How do I know that I am in His hands and my actions please Him? Lord, I cry out to thee... guide my paths, each and every day.

 

¹¹ You make known to me the path of life;
in your presence there is fullness of joy;
at your right hand are pleasures forevermore.

Psalm 16